As she walked towards the mounting block, I could see her visibly starting to shake. Her shoulders rose higher around her neck. The horse, previously standing quietly with her handler, started to dance and move away from the steps. Immediately, the horse was circled and held back in place. I stood up and left, I had seen enough. 

It was the start of the macabre interaction between a confused horse and a nervous rider. I wanted to shout stop! And help the rider find her grounding, calm herself before she climbed on the horse, but in this “fake it till you make it” world, she was told to swallow it and hide her fears… My friends, you can’t hide from a horse. 

My new mantra is “Don’t fake it, face it!”

This is a scenario that plays out almost daily between horses and humans. The fear virus spreads through the body, the what ifs and maybe flooding the emotional landscape. Our horses respond immediately, they don’t know how not to. 

Our heart rhythms can become entrained, but which way will it go… the nervous rider calming to meet the stoic, beautiful school master waiting patiently to carry them past their fears? 

Or will the younger horse, the dream partner for the person who waited a lifetime to have their own horse, will their heart surge in the wrong direction to meet the person stiffly walking towards them, with a mind full of doom? The perfect storm awaits. 

Of course, I can’t sit here and tell you that you are never going to get hurt. I expect at some point today you are going to get in your car and drive somewhere. But I bet you don’t walk towards your car saying, “Oh my gosh, I bet I crash today!” 

Fear is hands down the most common reason riders, or horse people in general seek us out at WISE Riders. Fear can be one of the most pervasive emotions we experience. Of course, it is vital, I have a brother who fears very little and his list of broken bones (albeit accompanied by spectacular stories) are starting to take their toll. 

When it comes to humans and horses, I feel there is the chicken and the egg scenario. The rider feels nervous, what if the horse spooks, trips, bucks, bolts, rears, falls? Our heart rate shoots up, our mouth goes dry, our bodies go stiff, the horse thinks, “Wow, what’s going on here, do I need to run”? 

“Is this person feeling bad because they know something I don’t?” 

It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy, and the horse responds in kind. Or a person rides a horse way over their pay grade and as the horse dances around due to feeling fresh, feeling the wind or a million other reasons, the over horsed human starts to panic, and a risky scenario begins.

I believe in the power of words and what we can attract to ourselves. I have seen this in action. I had a horse in my care who was incredible, he was perfect in every way. He would move off my energy and intention like no other. I had let a friend ride him. All I heard out of her mouth was “He is going to buck”. 

All the while I am watching my horse relaxed and calm walking along with a rhythmic walk and all was fine. “Will you please stop saying that” Again and again she stated the fact “He is going to buck”. I had enough. “Will you just get off” BANG. 

She was neatly put down on the floor in the first buck I had ever seen that horse do. No fanfare, just a neat and tidy up and down. He looked at me as if to say “Well that is what she wanted right? I mean I heard her 10 times!” Watch what messages you send your horse; they might just be listening. 

At this point you may be ready to hang up your boots and think why did I sign up for this series? 

Well, we can change and we will change! If you really want to, that is. This brings me to the next letter in our formula. 

S is for Safety. 

We need fear in our lives to a certain extent but the endless messages of fear we bombard ourselves with can hold us back from the joy and fun that is possible with horses. This game is way too expensive to not find joy in it. Remember your why from our earlier article.

We often tell ourselves stories that may be worse than the real situation. A Mark Twain quote I have often recounted to myself springs to mind. 

“I have lived through some terrible things and some of them actually happened.” This always makes me smile and helps calm the what if’s that things like heights put in my mind. 

How many of the things we worry about, the stories we lavishly develop in our heads happen? Not many. 

Furthermore, ask any enlightened instructor and they will tell you the more tense the body the lighter the seat, the lighter the seat the more likely the rider is to come off. 

There ARE ways to help ourselves feel safer and that in turn sends a message to our brains to stand down, ease up with the stories it fills us with to get us to step way back into the centre of our comfort zones. 

Safety equipment is something that can help us not only feel safer but be safer. 

I am not here to be the helmet police. I look at you all as consenting adults who have made it through the journey of life to get to this point, it is up to you what you do with your head or body. It is not for others to tell you what you should be doing. 

That said, I wear one and it makes me feel safer. I also use a body protector as I have a young horse, and regardless of age it makes me feel better. That allows me to be more relaxed in the saddle, ride better and lower my risk of falling off in the first place. Furthermore, I like neck rein. I use the 3 in 1 neck and chest plate from Ride Correct Connect. All these things can help us be safer and feel safer.

There are many additional options you can look at to lower your risk of a fall. I like what HorseClass instructor Wendy Murdoch talks about. She has you look around when your anxiety goes up on a horse and ask yourself, “what is my level of danger here”? Give it a number. If it is over a 5 out of 10 then DO SOMETHING, get off or whatever you can to BE safe. If it is lower than a 5 and you are just walking along but your brain is telling you to be afraid, then practise some calming techniques and see if you can bring that number down. 

Ok, so I can hear you say, that is all well and good, but I can’t help it. You can! There are many things you can do. As you heard in the interview with Lisa Pulliam in the webinar we shared above, our brains are capable of change, and the right tools can do just that.